Sometimes the universe lines up events for us just to prove a point and last night was a perfect example of being in the right place at the right time. I’d got myself a last minute ticket to Myf Warhurst’s ‘in Conversation’ about her new book ‘Middle Rage’. I’ve always been a massive fan of Myf, who isn’t? Most Australian Gen X’ers have grown up with Myf on their radio or TV screen. She’s part of the family which is why when you meet Myf in person it feels like they’re already best friends.
Her podcast with Zan Rowe ‘Bang On’ was the ultimate friendship shared with anyone who wanted to tune in. Myf’s latest podcast ‘The Moment’ is her solo show where it feels as if she’s set aside 30 minutes just to have a friendly catch up. She’s personable. She’s fun and probably one of the most knowledgeable people in Australia on the topic of music. Her reliability encourages instant rapport and her in person vibe is just as you would imagine. She’s rad.
Myf wrote her first book ‘Time of my Life’ in 2022. It was a joyful memoir that was expected from such a joyful person. My Goodreads review at the time was 5 stars, with the comment ‘I just want to be real life friends with her. Go Myf.” My impression and admiration for Myf is not uncommon which is why she was nervous about her first public event last night for her new book. Middle Rage isn’t joyful. Middle Rage is a revealing memoir that reflects deeply on the social condition of women and their place in society. At first glance I thought it would be a fun romp about (peri)menopause after her important documentary The Truth About Menopause but that was just a catalyst for something much more impactful.
After discovering how deep medical misogyny went in the doco she examines the history of the social conditioning that has kept women neatly in their lane. By sharing her own personal experience with coercive control she highlights how easy it is to make excuses for other people's bad behaviour and how quick we get desensitised to arseholes. You just have to look to the media for countless examples of where shitty behaviour is accepted or completely ignored. (ie Trump or Swans)
She referred to the ‘Great Remembering’. The horrendous and very real consequences to ignoring this behaviour. For me this is best expressed at the She Matters Mural in town. It’s an installation of over 200 portraits of women who are victims of domestic violence. Most people have seen it by now but if you haven't or you're coming to Ballarat - please visit it. It’s so incredibly overwhelming. All of those 200 hundred women are just like me. Just like you. I can’t even write about it without crying. It’s incredibly confronting but we have to look. If you don’t look, we will never improve the outcome for any women and their biggest threat will continue to be their intimate partners.
It’s completely fucked and that’s why Myf is pissed. This book is not joyful. It’s empowering. It’s vulnerable. It will help both men and women see what society has done to support and encourage a world where women put others needs and well being before their own. It's hopefully going to piss some people off. People need to get angry. Anger is energy that can be used for change.
Last night's experience got me so fired up which is awesome because today I’m presenting my stylescapes (design directions) to Respect Ballarat. Never have I felt such urgency to get the job right. My miniscule contribution to the incredible work that Respect Victoria does in the prevention of domestic violence could be one of the most impactful pieces of work I do. It is not about sales. It's not about impressing the board. It's about bringing the whole community together to fight against generations of repression and inequality. Wish me luck.
